| This is a question that I can't help but ask myself over and over again. Obviously, I'm a woman myself, and have stayed in some pretty dead-end relationships for no apparent reason but I tend to see myself as a little smarter than most when it comes to the opposite sex. My main example of this "Man-Induced Stupidity Syndrome", is my mom. She has been married to my step-dad for over 16 horrible years now. Ever since I can remember they haven't been happy, and over the years it has just gotten progressively worse. He is probably the biggest asshole I have ever had the priviledge of knowing, and unfortunately the only father figure I have ever had. He ignores my mom, treats her like crap and talks down to her, and is constantly trying to make her feel like she's crazy. Although he was only physically abusive once, at the beginning of their marriage, abuse isn't only physical. He both mentally and financially abuses her, and myself. However, I wasn't as lucky as my mom and suffered quite a few bruises, welts, and threats in the end. I think the moment I started hating him (and I don't use the word hate lightly), was my freshman year of highschool. After suffering some deep depression after the death of my grandma which was worsened by the horrible mistreatment from my stepdad, my mom tried to kill herself. After locking herself in her room while I was at school, and taking a cocktail of pills from sleeping to pain, she figured she would be gone just in time for me to find her after school. However, in a pill induced state she passed out and I literally saved her life by kicking down her bedroom door, calling 9-1-1, and after reviving her, knocking the pills out of her hands as she was trying recklessly to shove into her mouth. I then had to call my stepdad and give him the news as the paramedics were arriving. My stepdad got to the house just in time for my mom to cuss him out in front of all the neighbors. And I, empty inside, climbed into his car, her suicide note to me crinkling in my pocket. The first words out of his mouth to me were "I knew she was fucking crazy". The rest is a bit fuzzy but somehow my stepdad convinced them to let her out of the hospital that night, after of course she had ingested some tar-like substance to rid herself of all the pills. So at about 1 in the morning, my stepdad, my mom, my aunt and uncle (who had met us at the hospital), and I were all sitting around a table at Denny's. My stepdad then proceeded to laugh about the whole ordeal, including the fact that I had kicked down a door on my own. I remember at that exact moment that I was holding a fork in my right hand, and thinking to myself how good it would feel to pierce his skin with it. But of course I said nothing, and the bizarre reality of my life continued to exist. Needless to say, she didn't leave him after this. Even though his treatment of her has only worsened over the years. Now he sleeps in his recliner, doesn't speak to either of us (although he stopped talking to me long ago), and refuses to buy us anything we need. Also, instead of paying the bills he spoils himself with such items as a flat screen TV, a touch screen phone, a $1,000 gun, etc. He won't even pay for me to go to the doctor, even though I have hypothyroidism and actually need to go. And yet, despite the fact that he not only disowned her daughter among calling her such things as a "cunt" and a "whore", despite the fact that he is clearly having an affair and has contracted an STD over the time of their marriage, despite the fact that he tells her she is a worthless peice of shit and hasn't worn his wedding ring in years, and lies so much that he even believes them. She is still here. And not only is she still here, she is obsessed with him. Even obsessed with hating him. She spends all her time trying to find out things he's done (which includes hiring prostitutes, escorts, and looking up naked pictures of young girls). And every night she lays in her bed (and most days), crying. And not a quiet subtle cry, but bawling and moaning for hours at a time, just waiting for him to care. The sad thing is, he never will. Why do women put themselves through this, why do they care the most about people who just hurt them? Why can they never get out of a relationship because they keep wondering 'what-if' and hoping that their significant other will change. |
